Don't Touch My Wallflowers

It starts, slowly, but it builds. The massive wallflower-hungry hordes have been unleashed on a poor, teeth-gritting team of Bath and Body Works associates. "Six dollars for wallflowers? Starters and refills? Ooh, that's a good deal!" "Yes ma'am, it is." Forces smile. "Now, tell me, do you have any Sweet Pea refills?" "There might be some in the buckets..." Digs through massive red buckets. "I don't see any..." "Are you sure?" "Well, I don't think there's any in the back, but I can go check." "Oh, would you? That's so nice of you." I know darn good and well there's none in the back. But it makes them happy and I was thirsty anyway. So it went for a month: The Big Semi-Annual Sale.

It was chaos. But I loved it. All of us love it. At least the ones who know what we are doing, i.e. core associates, not new holiday ones. I don't know if it's usual to have a workforce who really seems happy with their jobs. Maybe it's just that we're all insane. So I fit right in. Which isn't to say that we core associates don't have our pet peeves....

"Kathleen! Do we have any..." "Kathleen! How do you do..." "Kathleen! Can you come to the wrap desk for a minute?" "Kathleen! Kathleen! Kathleen!" "I'm going to go in back for a minute, guys." (Translation: Leave me alone for two seconds.) And as she takes off the walkie, If they call my name one more time...

"These people don't know what they're doing." "I know. I'm having a nervous breakdown, Nettie's having a nervous breakdown, Whitney's having a nervous breakdown, and if they bring me any more stuff to box up..." "But Lauren, if we have nervous breakdowns, at least we won't have to worry about where we're going to live." "Hey, yeah! We can just go hang out at Three Rivers!"

During sale time, everything just kind of goes to pot. During last night's floorset to end the sale, I finally got the chance to fix the wallflowers -"Are you finished yet, Nettie?" Starters and refills, by fragrance and frequence- "Breathe, Nettie!" Even redid them this morning when we got more in. And if anyone messes with my wallflowers, I willl personally strangle you.