Really Bad Pickup Lines
Mmm, my hair smells good today...What, you don't think it smells good?
Speaking of smelly stuff, I work at Bath and Body Works. You should come in some time. That is, if you're man enough.
Why hello there, Officer. How can I help you? Oh, wait, you're here about Jeff, aren't you?
Wanna come back to my place? I've got the Golden Girls on DVD.
Anyone ever told you you look just like David Hasselhoff?
You know, I'm a really good cook when I'm stressed. And baby, I'm stressed.
I should tell you, there are other men in my life. I hope that doesn't intimidate you.
Look at what I can make my knee do!
Hi, my name is Nettie, and I'm not afraid of clowns!
I can sing the theme song to pretty much every '90's cartoon. And recite scenes from The Lion King by heart, too!
I'm doing the 7-day Dove deodorant test. I don't think it's working, though.
Are you a conservative? No? That's OK, I like liberals too. Except for the one who ripped the Dubya bumper sticker off of my poor Harvey. But liberals are okay, really they are...
10 Comments:
i love that other man in your life, he's a cutie!
Thanks, Better. Not many people are willing to so publicly tell me I'm cute.
I have to say that this is gold. Pure, unadulterated gold.
I think you picked up a huge male readership with this one! Good on ya Nettie!
I'm worried about the deodorant test.
I will not deny I haven't thought of vandalizing a liberal's bumper sticker, I just have never acted on the temptation. Usually liberals don't have those reservations.
Meet Darlene, 7 day dove user:
"I'm a mother of four; I don't really have time for myself, but I always take time for my underarms, after all I could get dumped and you never know when the man of your dreams is out looking for a woman with hair."
Hi there Blogger, a real useful blog.Keep with the good work.
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I send you warm regards and wishes of continued success.
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Please,accept my congratulations for your excellent work!
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Best regards!
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