Crash into Me

My interview with Johnny Crash:

1. Has Harvey ever flirted with another car? If so, who and what were the conditions? A: Not that I know of, but of course I don't know what he's doing in the mall parking lot when I leave him there for hours at a stretch. After all, I don't want him to be lonely.

2. You can bring one person back to life for a day to go shopping with them. Who is it and where will you go? A: I'd have to say my great-grandmother. I know now she was on a fixed income, but she always delighted in sending us the regular check. She was very small, about 5 feet even, but she had impeccable taste. I'd want to go shopping for clothes with her, and she could help me pick out something better than PJ's, and delight in how much I've changed in almost ten years. And we'd have to stop by Bath and Body Works so I could show my friends how cool she is/was.

3. You can transport Harvey and yourself to any location on the planet for a vacation. You have one week to enjoy the scenery and you have 1,000 dollars spending money. Where do you go?
A: Ooh, tough question. Since this is fantasy, I'd have to say Israel. It's not terribly safe right now- maybe not ever- but it would be so cool to see the Holy Land. I want to see the history of the place, where Judaism and Christianity meet, where a people fought so hard to get their own land, and where, of course, the greatest miracles of all time happened.I hope someday I can really go there.

4. What is the most amusing bumper sticker you have ever seen and why? A: Actually, I saw one yesterday that really touched me. It was for a Down's Syndrome Coalitition and it said, "My grandkid has more chromosomes than yours." But the most amusing ones I've seen recently are the ones for John Kerry. Those are really funny.

5.Upon organizing your closet you can't help but notice a real E.T. in there hiding out. Your first words? What would your next move be? A: Well, I'd probably scream first (there's a reason why my friends don't let me watch horror movies) But then I'd go, "Well, you obviously like my closet, why don't you finish cleaning it out? And if you keep my room clean I won't report you to the feds, how's that for a deal?"