More Q & A

Darlene, she of the wicked sense of humor, asked me:

1. Besides a wallet, what is in your purse right now? Well, some ordinary stuff, some not so much. A CD player.Two AA batteries that I don't know if they're dead or not. Several mix CDs that I have been told "make no sense". A Marble Slab card. Two ancient York Peppermint Patties that I probably shouldn't eat. Cell phone. House and car keys. Reese's flavored lip gloss. Two half-finished poems. A prescription I haven't filled yet. SpongeBob pen. Life-saving medication. Sunglasses. Spearmint gum. And pink eyeshadow.

2. Has a childhood sweetheart ever broken your heart? I don't know if I'd call him a childhood sweetheart, but yeah. His name was Josh and we were both thirteen. He broke up with me because he couldn't deal with me being just friends with another guy. And then he wanted me back. Fat chance on that, Josh.

3. When you talk to yourself, what do you mostly say? A typical conversation goes something like this: "Oh nice,why don't you walk into the wall Nettie? I know I saw a Sheer Freesia Wallflower in the understock, now where is it? Harvey, where are you Harvey? Dude, it's seriously HOT in here! I really shouldn't wear my platforms to work cause I keep tripping on my own big feet. You know, Nettie, if you start singing along to the Dixie Chicks you have going on your headphones people are going to look at you funny. Ooh, I need to remember to get turkey at Wal-Mart. I forgot to go to my adviser's today. Why don't I just trip over everything?" Along those lines, anyway- aren't you glad you asked?

4. The man of your dreams shows up at your door with a UPS package meant for a neighboring senior, you have only one line to reel him in, what would it be? I work at Bath and Body Works, and my house is much more fragrant than that old lady's- wanna smell?

5. If you could write a proverb for teenagers with acne, what would it be? When you no more teenager, you no more have acne. Which effectively means that in two weeks mine will be gone. Scratch that. Modern medicine good for you!

That was quite entertaining, and, I hope, informative. If anyone else wants to be interviewed, let me know so you can join the fun!