Let's Hope This Never Happens
I am really dense sometimes. I was sitting here watching The Nanny and wondering, "Gee, Lifetime usually shows the episodes in order, why are they showing the episode where Fran gets audited today?" It wasn't until halfway through the Golden Girls episode where Dorothy gets audited that I realized, "Hey, maybe Lifetime's going with a tax day theme." Duh. At least I wasn't surprised when Blanche got audited. I hope that never happens to me.....
"Miss B., what are these deductions for gifts sent to someone named Bubba?"
"I can explain that..."
"And I've never heard of this disability- blogging addiction, what's a blog anyway?"
"Oh, they are really cool, you want to see mine?"
"No. Let's just get on with the audit."
"Yes sir, I am happy for you to audit me." (ask me where that quote REALLY came from sometime).
"Now, I see you work at Bath and Body Works?"
"Uh-huh. Yet you apparently have allergies, how can you stand to work there? And isn't it true you ended up in the E.R.? While you were at work?"
"Well, yes, Mr. Auditer, sir..."
"SILENCE! Did I say you could speak?"
"Well, no sir, but as you will notice in line 10.C., I also suffer from an inability to shut up."
"Well, that I believe."
"Thank you sir."
"Now, what's this deduction about?"
"Miss B., I asked you a question."
"ANSWER the question!"
"But you told me to shut up."
"Well, now I'm telling you to talk!"
"Yes sir. You see this deduction is for..."
"You know what? You annoy me. You're going down."
"Because I can."
"Nooooo! Somebody rescue me. Somebody. Anybody?"
"Don't leave me here like this! Guys? Help me! Guys?"